As we approach the end of 2024, many of us might find ourselves reflecting on the past year—recalling its momentous events, disappointments, regrets, celebrations, and even unexpected losses or new beginnings. A lot can happen in a year, and while the concept of "New Year's resolutions" might feel outdated or even cliché, it’s still worthwhile to take a moment to P & R—Pause & Reflect, a practice of mindful reflection on the past to glean insights for the future.
In a world where everything moves at lightning speed, with answers and updates at the tap of a finger, creating a margin to reflect could be exactly what we need. This pause allows us not only to process what we’ve experienced but also to grow from it.
Brené Brown, in her book Atlas of the Heart, highlights the powerful function of regret. She writes, "I firmly believe that regret is one of our most powerful emotional reminders that reflection, change and growth are necessary. In our research, regret emerged as a function of empathy. And, when used constructively, it's a call to courage and a path toward wisdom." Regret, as she explains, isn’t something to avoid but to learn from. It’s an opportunity to grow—not just for others' sake, but also for ourselves. By taking a moment to acknowledge our regrets, disappointments, and hurts, alongside our accomplishments and moments of joy, we allow ourselves to step into a posture of humility and experience our own humanness and the humanness of others.
This isn’t about dwelling or spiraling into negativity and all the missed opportunities, (though that can happen; we’re human). It’s about evolving—with compassion for ourselves—into a version of us that learns and grows. Imagine what might shift in our relationships if more of us chose to pause, reflect and try again, rather than falling into cycles of blame, avoidance or passivity.
Personally, I make it a tradition each year—on January 30th or 31st—to visit a cozy café with a warm cup of coffee and my journal. I spend time writing about four key themes from the past year:
Highlights: The moments that brought me joy, laughter, connection and pride.
Lowlights: The tough moments I encountered—loss, grief, anger, disappointment.
Learnings: The lessons those lowlights taught me, and what the universe—or God—might be revealing to me and wanting me to let go of or continue growing in.
Hopes: My aspirations for the new year, along with the values I wish to embrace and embody in various areas of my life, such as personal, social, financial, and spiritual.
Putting pen to paper for these reflections has become a grounding ritual. It allows me to celebrate wins, acknowledge shortcomings without judgment, and focus on how I’d like to carry those lessons into the new year.
Sure, resolutions can feel overwhelming, and many of us abandon them quickly. But what if we shifted our focus? Instead of rigid goals, we could reflect on our values and the person we want to become and the life we truly want to live?
So, as 2024 comes to a close, consider this your invitation to Pause & Reflect. Pour yourself something warm, grab a journal, and take a moment to look back on the year. What were your highlights? What moments challenged you the most? What lessons did those experiences teach you, and how can you embrace acceptance over the hardships as you move forward? As you carve out time to reflect, my hope is that you might just discover how far you’ve come this past year—and where you’d like to go next. It may not always be a "happy new year", but perhaps we can wish each other a "hopeful new year", as we welcome ongoing growth and take more courageous steps to become the people we were created to be.
Comments